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Bristlebane Day 2017: A Plethora of Pranksters

Jarno Wiggletoes just adored Bristlebane Day pranks. Unfortunately, the pranking genius that seemed so common in his fellow halflings seemed to have utterly passed him by, and his jokes tended to fall very flat. Thus, operating as a vendor for Bristlebane Day recipes and items was perfect for him, allowing him to at least feel like he was pranking-by-association when people bought his wares.

Once in a while he still tried to prank others, but as he saw his first customer of the season approaching, he gave up on THAT idea right away. However much he would like to prank the near-legendary Niami DenMother, he knew that would not end well. In fact, with any other well-known prankster he'd have likely tried to pick their brain for some fail-safe pranking ideas. With "Mum", though, the best idea was to get her out of the shop quickly. When your livelihood depended on sales, No Good Thing came from letting Mum run amok unless she liked you. It was best to butter her up and get her out the door quickly before chaos ensued.

Mum was so tickled by the hinged Rivervale pantry that he demonstrated that she immediately rushed home, trailed by a large barbarian she hired to carry it for her. Clearly she had plans for it, and Jarno heaved a mental sigh of relief even as he plotted how he could use her purchase as a selling point. ("Why even Niami DenMother has purchased one of these beauties, and you know how hard she is to please with kitchen furniture!")

His mood raised even more as he saw a neon pink frog head over mounted on a purple sokokar. The berry bovoch warder that she had following her gave him an excuse to try one of his newest pranking items. "Well hello there lovely pink miss! I have just the item for you! A spell to summon your very own spotted baby bovoch! He'd be just the thing to keep your warder company!

"Oooh, that WOULD be lovely! Pinking fribbled her flippers as she eagerly purchased then scribed the scroll. "FRRRO--o-o-aaaaakk?!" Her normally-resounding croak sounded a bit odd as she found herself rapidly shrinking once she cast the spell.

Rather than be upset about the surprise, however, the froglok dropped the illusion spell and planted an extremely soggy smacking froggy kiss on his cheek. "It is perfect! There are many times when I've wished I could shrink down in various situations! Thanks!"

"Eugggh!" Jarno waited until Pinking was out the door before he scrubbed his cheek and looked plaintively at the laughing customers standing in line to buy from him. "Does it count as pranking when the person you try to prank actually thanks you?"


Pinking froaked happily to herself as she headed for New Halas. Not only could she think of times when such a spell would be useful, but increasing her bovoch horde always amused her. She suspected that a couple of her larger friends would find even more use than she did in the handy shrink spell, provided they could convince the baby bovoch to stay hidden!

Spurred by that particular thought, she ducked off the snowy path to hide behind a handy bank of snow. The spell, crafty little cantrip that it was, was very easy to cast. Convincing the baby bovoch to stay hidden took a bit longer, but eventually she came up with a suitable distraction and reward for it, so it didn't try to follow her as she hopped away -- or tried to, at least. Tiny patches of ice were not so tiny when you were that massively shrunken, and after three falls, she finally decided that flying low to the ground was a better idea than trying to hop through the snowy hazards of the Frostfang Sea.

When she reached Gnormajean's bakery, she was momentarily stumped by the fact that the door was HUGE in comparison to her own shrunken size. She really didn't want to dispel the shrink quite yet, but she didn't really want to dodge all the larger folks coming and going from the shop. It took her a moment to notice a smaller wide door off to one side. It was definitely light enough for fae and arasai to open, and wide enough to give their wings clearance, so it was perfect for one extremely shrunken froglok.

Pinking was used to folks noticing her due to her coloration, so she had to do a lot more dodging of careless feet than she was used to, but she eventually managed to slip into the kitchen part of the shop behind a busy sales elf. Her friend Scarletwing was sitting at a table, helping to package up the Bristlebane candy grab bags that had been such a hit last year. Gnormajean was busy icing a cake as the two women chatted, and her husband Agnor was mending a hinged door to one of the stoves.

"... she said she'd be here around this time, but I haven't seen her yet. I've set aside a special batch of the Bug Bites for her, and the way they've been selling out so quickly out front, we'll be hard-pressed to defend these from hungry frogloks if she doesn't come to get them soon."

"**frrrrrrooooaaaaakkkkkk!**" Pinking once again proved that her most impressive croak wasn't as impressive when she was working with a tinier set of lungs. However, it was still surprising enough, when coming from underneath the table that Scarlet has been sitting at, to have the aerakyn shadowknight on her feet with her sword half-drawn before the sound finished. Gnorma, meanwhile, had apparently decided to experiment with squirting icing on the ceiling instead of on the cake, and Agnor slammed the oven door closed so hard that the newly-repaired hinge almost broke again.

Giggling unrepentantly, Pinking hopped out from under the table and dispelled the shrink spell. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have startled all of you while you were working on such a busy day, but I couldn't resist!

Scarlet shook her head and smirked at the froglok. "Careful, or she'll put you to cleaning that ceiling to make up for startling her like that. I, on the other hand, want you to sit down and help with these bags while you tell me all about how you shrank that small. It'd be especially useful for someone as large as I."

"Of course! Of course! I thought of you and Ngranna as soon as I learned of this shrink, Scarlet. And I figured I'd multitask while explaining about it, since it seems things are selling almost as quickly as you prep them!"

Talk soon turned to the absent Niami and speculation on what sorts of mischief she was likely getting into this spring.

"She said she wasn't planning any huge prank this year, but she'd say that regardless, wouldn't she? She's been laying the groundwork well in advance when she does prank, but tends to be pretty, well, mum about what she's up to." Gnorma shrugged.

"She told me what she was up to, sort of, but I don't actually believe it." Scarlet shrugged, careful to keep her large wings carefully furled. "She said she had to get ready for a date tonight. I mean, I know she has some secret admirer that asked for a date for today", but she actually seemed like she was taking it seriously, rather than someone's transparent attempt at a prank."

Pinking fribbled in thought, her rubbery pink lips making an absent motorboating sound while she wiggled her large flippers. "Well, there's more than one way to prepare for such a ... date ... and I'm sure whatever she does, she'll manage to turn it around so the joke is on the prankster. I mean, who would seriously think that Bristlebane Day was a good time to ask Mum for a blind date and think to get off unscathed?!"

All three women started to giggle, but stopped the moment that Agnor cleared his throat. The quiet Coldain might not speak much, but when he did, he was worth listening to.

"Perhaps he's counting on that. I don't mean the pranking part, but the part where folks expect it to be a prank. If it actually works out, great for both of them. If it doesn't work off, he can pretend it was all a poor attempt at a joke. It may be embarrassing, but less embarrassing than being turned down by her." As the women stared at him with their mouths wide open at this odd bit of logic, he gave them his best impassively bland look, which was quite good indeed, and stated, "After all the male ego is a fragile thing, right?" With that, he bowed himself out of the kitchen, keeping his straight face with an effort as gales of female laughter followed him out the door.


Once the delivery barbarian had left with a solid tip and a slice of freshly-baked cherry pie, Mum spent the rest of the morning rearranging furniture and cooking a last few items to go in the growing collection of food in her icebox that were best served either cold or at room temperature. If she was wrong in her guess, then all of it would keep another day or three until she and friends could eat it all.

After a filling lunch and a short nap, she scampered around the house, ensuring that all windows and doors were locked and that the curtains were firmly closed before she finished the rest of her preparations for her evening "date". She'd not put it past some folks to try to spy upon her to figure out what, if any, mischief she was up to this Bristlebane Day, and she wasn't about to make it easy on them.

The last of the spies, Oldar Grumblebelly lasted another hour after the curtains were drawn before he gave up trying to listen for clues over the sounds of his loudly grumbling tummy. (The delicious smells coming from Mum's home had been making him intensely hungry, and food won over curiousity yet again.)

Just as the sun was kissing the horizon, beginning to paint the sky in a glorious sunset, there was a quiet tapping on a door in Niami's house. Not the front door, but the back door that led from her kitchen to the rosebush maze that had sprung up during Erollisi Day. Mum nodded to herself at the sound and shuffled slowly to open the kitchen door.

Standing there haloed by the setting sun was a halfling known to many as "Blat Berisen", with a bouquet of roses extended towards the door. As he stared at Mum, his jaw dropped and the flowers started to fall from his hand.

"Och. Jus' as I thought." Without another word, Mum grabbed the still-stunned "halfling", pulled him inside and closed the door before any spies could really see what was going on.

Blat simply ... stared. The vision standing in the kitchen with him looked to be many pounds heavier than Niami, though it was hard to tell with the oversized fluffy bathrobe that was covering her from neck to toes. Bright orange hair that did not even have a passing resemblance to any haircolor caused by nature tried to escape from large curlers that were attempting to escape from a ratty old hairnet. Her nose seemed to be larger than he remembered, and had what looked to be a hairy wart at the end of it.

Then she reached for the ties to the bathrobe, and he backed up quickly, bumping into the now-closed kitchen door.

"Tchah! I see th' costume I am preparing frae Nights o' th' Dead works well. An' if it had been anyone but ye at th' door, that's all he would see afore he was shown th' door." Mum giggled as she removed the bathrobe, and untied the extra pillow from around her middle, revealing a nice dress underneath. The hairnet, wig and curlers followed quickly, revealing her nicely-braided red and silvering hair, and then the fake nose followed suit. "Och, th' look on yuir face was perfect, tallstuff! Did ye really expect me tae tear off my clothes or such?"

Blat chuckled long and hard before he responded. "Oh, you continually surprise me, little one, but even for you that DID seem to be a bit of a stretch." He looked down at the heaped bathrobe so he could get his expression under a bit more control before he bowed gallantly. "It seems the joke is on me, so it behooves me to act like a gentleman and treat you to dinner that I promised you."

"Ne'er mind that. Ye'll nae get a moment's peace if we're seen outside tonight. I figured after all these many years, ye mus' be tired o' folks only remembering th' pranking during yuir holiday an' nae any o' th' other things that ye enjoy." With that, she pressed on a certain spot on her new pantry, and grinned as it swiveled open to reveal a dining area with a table set for two. "After all, ye did create us halflings in yuir own image, an' we love our food, sae it stands tae reason. Besides, I remember that tall tale aboot th' princess that ye've been telling folks, an' ye often get sidetracked by guacamole, it seems."

As his eyes followed her pointing hand to a large dish of guacamole sitting beside some corn chips, he rubbed his belly with a chuckle. Let the other gods snicker about his need to sometimes sneak around in the semblance of a mortal if they wished, but nothing beat being treated to a proper halfling meal now and then without all the fanfare that others relied on. He'd bet that few of them ate as well as he was about to, or his name wasn't Blat Berisen ... erm Bristlebane.

It is once again time for mischief and merriment during the Bristlebane Day celebration! This event will run from March 30 at 12:01 am Pacific until April 13 at 11:59pm Pacific. Extra one-day only events will also run on April 1 to celebrate the highest of High Silly Days.

This year's event will include all of the returning quests and items, as well as 14 new buyables, a new crafting recipe book, and one new quest.

New Craftables

The "a Bristlebane Day merchant" found at every city crafting society area will sell you "Perfectly Serious Items to Craft VIII" which contains the following items to craft. These recipes, which can be created by all crafting classes, require an event harvest as well as common tier 1 and tier 2 harvestables. (The Jester's Gardens for the event harvestables are found in Antonica, Commonlands, Darklight Wood, Timorous Deep, Greater Faydark and Frostfang Sea.)

Cherry Pie Slice
Cut Cherry Pie
Chest of Fools Gold
Drogan Bucket
Drogan Table
Eaten Fish Platter
Gold Coin Cushion
Gold Filigreed Vase
Patched Plum Cushion
Plate of Sunshine Gems
Silly Bloom
Silly Bloom Seedling
Wicker Basket of Green Beans

And yes, the pie slice fits back into the cut pie perfectly. :D

New Buyables

Fourteen new items can be purchased from the "a Bristlebane Day merchant" found at every city crafting society area. Prices below are in Fool's Gold Coin, the tradeable currency from this event.

A Golden Pekin
10 coins
A Were Rabbit
10 coins
Hinged Rivervale Pantry
(door item*)
30 coins
Jocular Patchcraft
Thrasher Plushie
20 coins
Jovial Patchcraft
Growler Plushie
20 coins
Petamorph Wand:
Strongbox Mimic
6 coins
Brilliant Temptation
5 coins

*"Hinged Rivervale Pantry" works just like a door - you can "Use" to open and close it.

Yep, there's more! First is the "Spotted Baby Bovoch", an heirloom spell for 20 coins. The spell shrinks the caster by 90% and summons a fluff pet Spotted Baby Bovoch. Yep, I said 90% shrink. :D

Then there are two level 85 flying mounts, each of which costs 300 coins. Like most mounts, these can also convert into house items.

Ruby Bixie Skimmer
300 coins
Topaz Bixie Skimmer
300 coins

Last but not least in the buyables is a new appearance set that is similar to a set we can already craft, but with gold tones replacing the greens.

  • Jolly Bristlebane Day Cap - 5 coins
  • Jolly Bristlebane Day Boots - 5 coins
  • Jolly Bristlebane Day Gloves - 5 coins
  • Jolly Bristlebane Day Robe - 10 coins

New Quest

There is one new quest this year, "Pains of Herding", offered by Turry Goldsworth who is located just off the docks in the Enchanted Lands. Quest rewards are your choice of 10 Fool's Gold Coins or a no-trade Topaz Skimmer housepet. (It uses the same model as the Topaz Bixie Skimmer mount, but defaults to a bit smaller, and is a housepet version.)

Casdoe from the Maj'Dul server has come through once again on quest trackers to make it easier for you to track which alts have done which of the event quests, collections, etc. Bristlebane Day Quest Tracker in XLS form for those who want an editable spreadsheet and the Bristlebane Day Quest Tracker in PDF form for those who want to view the pdf version of the checklist.

April 1?

Bristlebane holds April 1 in special regard, and considers it to be his special feast day. Because of this, there are one-day only events that occur every April 1. What does this mean to you?

Harvestables: on this special day, there will be Jester's Superior Gardens scattered all over the Enchanted Lands. These special shrub nodes will give you any of the special events harvestables from: Frostfell, Erollisi Day, Nights of the Dead, Tinkerfest, Brewday Festival, and Bristlebane Day. The upgraded version of the pack pony, on this one day only, will bring back a HUGE ton of harvestables from all of the above events, so make sure to be standing near your depot, and/or have tons of bag space, when you collect holiday harvestables from your upgraded pack pony on that day.

Frostfell in ... April? Most of us are happy with one season of Frostfell a year, but for those like {cough} Lera {cough} who can't get enough of Frostfell, as well as those who find themselves with a Frostfell fuel shortage due to poor planning, there will be Frostfell crafting stations and fuel merchants in Enchanted Lands and Sinking Sands only on April 1.

Questing: On April 1, seek out the sphinx located near the docks in the Enchanted Lands. You will need to answer some riddles, and do some traveling (all of which is safe for even low level adventurers) in order to claim your rewards. The three "Riddled" quests from past years are returning this year with one new reward added to each quest:

  • Riddled Throughout the Land - NEW: Crimson Stone of Gygax
  • Riddled Again - NEW: Emerald Stone of Chance
  • Riddled Yet Again* - NEW: Onyx Stone of Arneson
*Note that "Riddled Yet Again" will not be available on the TLE server due to zone inaccessibility.

Crimson Stone of Gygax -- Emerald Stone of Chance -- Onyx Stone of Arneson

Quick Note

If you're doing the Plethora of Patchcraft Parts quest from EL during the event, here's the fast breakdown of which zones have which type of patchcraft critters:
  • Growlers (bears): Frostfang Sea and Greater Faydark
  • Howlers (wolves): Darklight Woods and Commonlands
  • Thrashers (badgers): Antonica
  • Snappers (crabs): Timorous Deep

Created: 2017-03-17 05:56:06          
Last Modified By: Niami Denmother          
Last Modified on: 2017-04-01 03:21:12          

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